Rumblings’ Women Committed To Connect For 31 Days: Four Discoveries To Flourish After 50

For 31 days, a group of Rumblings’ women committed to connecting with other women every day in October. We intentionally connected with friends, neighbors, family, and strangers throughout the month by sending a variety of handwritten notes, emails, texts, care packages, flowers, and meals. All our gestures were meant to let people know we were thinking about them. 

While we were intentional about connecting, it’s not surprising we got far more in return than the small effort it took to send a quick note or email. 

Here are some highlights of what we learned:

Being intentional saved us time! We don’t know about you, but we often spend a lot of time thinking about what we should do.  We put writing a thank you note, sending a house-warming gift, or shooting off a quick text on our “to-do” list, and then, frequently we spend more time feeling guilty about not completing the tasks than the time it would take to just do them. By committing to connect with someone every day, we found ourselves taking action right away instead of thinking about it day after day. We were surprised by how many more people we were able to connect with and how little time it took. 

The connection was a two-way gift. Yes, we made the commitment to connect with someone every day in October, but ultimately we were surprised by how connected we felt in return. As we reached out to colleagues we hadn’t chatted with in years to congratulate them on a work milestone or a new career, we found ourselves invited to more coffee dates and socially-distanced walks. We caught up with people we hadn’t spoken with for a few years.  As the month progressed, we found ourselves increasingly connecting with others without overthinking it. Instead of just reading social media posts, we started responding to them with more than just a thumbs up. The more we wished people happy birthday and commented on social media posts, the more people began engaging with us in return. During the month we received unexpected care packages and very sincere notes from unexpected people in our lives. The more we connected with people, the more connected we felt.  But, what surprised us the most was that the more we focused on connecting with others, the more we sincerely appreciated and recognized the efforts of those connecting with us. And, for that we are grateful. 

Vulnerability and sharing created a deeper connection. We don’t know about you, but being vulnerable has not come easy for either of us. As we built our careers, our walls went up as we tried to be who we were supposed to be to succeed. And as we aged, we realized that by doing that we cut off our authentic selves from others, and didn’t connect as deeply. This challenge encouraged us to step into our vulnerability and share. We reached out to people in ways that we hadn’t in years. We reconnected with friends we had lost touch with and apologized for letting time and our careers get in the way of our friendships. It was hard to recognize and be accountable for the role we personally played in lost connections with people we care about, but this challenge inspired us to do so.  

Strong social connections matter and it’s never too late to reap the benefits. Social connections matter throughout our lives, but especially in our 50s. Research has shown that strong relationships and personal connections help us live longer.  Women in our life stage have told us they feel isolated. Many of their social connections were built while raising kids or building careers and as they’ve aged, those connections have disappeared and they now feel lonely. 

Although this was a 31-day challenge, one of our Rocks or foundational principles at Rumblings is social connection. We believe strongly in the value of social connection. We’ve learned as we’ve aged, we absolutely need to devote time to care and nurture our relationships with a full heart. We must engage with others by paying attention and investing in our relationships. 

There can be a variety of valid reasons why we abandon connections, but this challenge taught us that it is never too late to connect in a renewed way—one that is more emotional, more authentic, and more deeply committed to building trust. Leaning into the awareness that our connections have value and we are each worthy of investing in creating lasting bonds is imperative to our health and well-being.  These connections are the ones that make our lives richer. 

Although the challenge is over, we encourage all of you to continue to connect with others.  Send a quick email, text, or handwritten note. Make a list of friends you’ve lost touch with and send them a message through social media. It doesn’t take much to connect, but the benefits can be life-changing. 

Ladies, let’s continue to connect as we flourish through our 50’s. 

Together we RUMBLE!