Exploring Vietnam: Discoveries, Courage, and Heartfelt Conversations

Tam Coc, Ninh Binh Province, Vietnam

There are many thoughts to explore in a recap of our recent women’s trip to Vietnam. There are many things to choose from, including the fantastic food, the hospitality of the people, the culture of Vietnam, the benefits of traveling with women, and the differences in women's lives in a more restrictive society.

 It’s tough to choose just one aspect to focus on when recounting our two-week trip. From facing our deepest fears head-on to forming heartfelt connections that transcended language barriers, we discovered the true power of travel. 

 Here are the valuable insights we gained about ourselves and the world around us as we traveled across this fascinating nation in our first Rumblings Midlife Women’s trip to Vietnam. 

Embracing Courage: Conquering Fears Together

 Embarking on our women’s trip to Vietnam, 10 of us set forth with diverse expectations and our own self-defined personal boundaries.  We can look back and laugh at this now, but some of us were hesitant about trying unfamiliar foods, while others had reservations about hopping on motorbikes or holding snakes (yep, you read that right!) But you know what? By the end of the trip, we had each shattered some, if not all, of our self-imposed limits one by one, surprising even ourselves. 

We became masters of embracing change, diving headfirst into new experiences, and cheering each other on like a group of fearless daredevils. The phrase “I’ll try if you try it first” became our motto, and let us be clear, it was uttered more times than we can count! 

We felt a rush when we conquered our fears together. It ignited a spark, making us braver and more eager to explore the unknown. We realized that the things we feared were often not scary. Crossing a street without traffic signs and amidst hundreds of motorbikes? Piece of cake!

Imagine a group of midlife women, each with her unique background and perspective, coming together to face their fears head-on. It was an incredible display of collective courage and support. We found strength in unity, and it made all the difference. 

We discovered that embracing change and conquering our fears wasn’t just a personal triumph — it was an empowering journey that brought us closer as friends and transformed us in ways we never expected. Stepping outside our comfort zones became addictive, and we couldn’t wait to tackle the next unfamiliar challenge. 

 In a country as vibrant and captivating as Vietnam, we realize that genuine growth comes when we dare to step beyond what's familiar. Our journey was about more than just visiting popular tourist spots; it was about embracing the rich culture and immersing ourselves in the beauty of the unknown.

We formed an unbreakable bond, supporting and encouraging each other every step of the way. We learned to trust ourselves and each other, and that trust became the foundation for our incredible adventures.

Heartfelt Connections: Beyond Language Barriers

Here's the thing about Vietnam: it's not just the breathtaking landscapes and delicious food that will leave you in awe—it's the people. During our trip, we were lucky enough to witness the genuine hospitality and open-heartedness of the Vietnamese people, and let me tell you - it touched our souls in ways we never expected.

Now, how did we connect with locals when there was a language barrier? Well, that's the beauty of heartfelt connections—they transcend words. The shared smiles, the warmth in their eyes, and the gestures of kindness spoke volumes.

We met incredible individuals along our journey, like Ms. Dinh, a gracious woman who opened her home to us, sharing a meal, her life experiences, and stories. We bonded with motorbike drivers who proudly shared their family histories and tales of village life. Even young children and teenagers welcomed us with open arms, excited to connect with us, capture moments, and share them on their social media platforms. Kids really are the same everywhere, aren't they?

Ms. Dinh, outside of her home in Hanoi, Vietnam

But one of the most unexpected connections came from a simple encounter with a seamstress. As she took our measurements for custom silk pajamas, we discovered a shared experience. Our mothers were seamstresses, and despite the continents separating us, we realized how similar our lives and memories were. It was a profound moment of connection that transcended language and cultural barriers.

Forgiveness and Kindness: Unveiling the Boundless Humanity in Vietnam

What struck us the most was the concept of Ubuntu—the belief that humanity is bound together through hospitality, generosity, and compassion. 

Despite coming from different backgrounds, the Vietnamese people exemplified these qualities in their interactions with us and each other. Whether we needed an interpreter or relied on gestures and smiles, the locals opened their hearts to us. They welcomed us into their world, allowing us to see Vietnam through their eyes. From Hanoi to Ho Chi Minh (or Saigon, as it's lovingly called), we witnessed the beauty of a culture that values human connection above all else.

It's worth mentioning that Vietnamese drivers honk their horns not out of anger but to create awareness. It's a small detail that speaks volumes about their helpful nature and willingness to assist one another. We even witnessed a traffic accident, and the way everyone came together to help the motorbike rider was truly inspiring. It's these moments of kindness and solidarity that remind us of the power of humanity.

Exploring Vietnam’s Hidden Gems: Unforgettable Off-The-Beaten-Path Adventures

Now, let's talk about the best-kept secrets of our trip—the experiences that took us off the beaten path and allowed us to discover the true essence of Vietnam. 

These hidden gems were the highlights of our adventure, giving us a taste of local life and immersing us in the heart and soul of the country.

Picture yourself sitting in a local coffee shop, sipping traditional coffee with condensed milk over ice, a concoction known as Cà Phê Sữa Đá. The locals would happily show you the ropes, ensuring you experience this caffeinated delight to the fullest.

Or imagine strolling through a countryside road and stumbling upon a wayside rest, complete with hammocks, cold beer, and locally grown nuts and fruits. 

We couldn't resist picking fresh herbs and indulging in juicy mangoes and passion fruit.

We also had the privilege of exploring a food market with a local chef, indulging in delicious tofu that melted in our mouths—a far cry from what we usually find back home.

But one of our most cherished memories was sharing a heartfelt meal in a village, prepared with love and enjoyed by a local family. It was a true embodiment of the Vietnamese spirit of togetherness and community.

Nurturing Bonds and Culinary Delights: Building Community Through Food in Vietnam

The food in Vietnam was a culinary adventure like no other. We started with some hesitation, unsure of what to expect, but as the trip progressed, we became increasingly brave in our gastronomic explorations. We tried dishes we had never even dreamed of before, and it was a journey of flavors and tastes that delighted our senses.

Vietnam is a paradise for food lovers. The variety of fruits, vegetables, spices, and local delicacies is mind-boggling. Everything is incredibly fresh, sourced locally, and prepared with love. We savored each bite and marveled at the creativity and inventiveness of Vietnamese cuisine.

As we returned to our standard Western fare after the trip, we felt a culture shock and a longing for the vibrant flavors we had grown accustomed to. We yearned for another bowl of Pho or a refreshing Saigon beer from a local market or food stand.

Sharing family-style meals became a highlight of our trip because of the incredible food and the memories and connections we forged over those communal dining experiences. We learned to eat like locals, embracing the chopsticks and savoring each dish with delight. And each meal was accompanied by sharing our daily highlights (our 'roses'), what we were looking forward to (our 'buds'), and even our least favorite moments of the day (our 'thorns'). And let's not forget the lively toasts we raised to neighboring tables, with an enthusiastic "Một – Hai – Ba – dzô!" which means one, two, three, drink! We quickly became proficient in this Vietnamese tradition.

Empowering Women: Unveiling Shared Challenges Across Borders

Throughout our journey, we couldn't help but notice the strength and resilience of women in Vietnam. It became an ongoing joke that we predominantly saw women working, running shops, cooking, and managing stands in local markets. It was a partial joke but highlighted women's evolving roles and responsibilities in Vietnamese society.

Despite traditional norms, we met women breaking boundaries and going against the grain. We encountered inspiring stories like that of Ms. Minh, who held a job outside her husband's family home and became a successful businesswoman, defying societal expectations. We witnessed the increasing presence of women in careers and the shifting dynamics within households, where couples shared household duties and lived together before marriage.

In Vietnam, we discovered that women face many of the same challenges regardless of their cultural background. It reminded us that we are all connected, navigating similar paths and striving for empowerment uniquely.

A local seamstress in Ninh Binh

Embark on Your Vietnam Adventure: Now is the Perfect Time 

Our trip to Vietnam was nothing short of life-altering. Some of us had waited for decades to embark on this adventure of a lifetime. 

Vietnam became more than just a destination—it felt like home to many of us, with an unspoken thread connecting us to the country and its people.

There was a sense of shared memories, whether through our own experiences or the stories passed down from family members. For Americans, it was intertwined with the memories of foster siblings, refugee friends, and their descendants who still have ties to Vietnam, and an uncle and a father.  Our humanity became intricately entwined with theirs, reminding us of our interconnectedness as human beings.

If there's one piece of advice we can give you, it's this: embrace the opportunity to travel to Vietnam, immerse yourself in the local culture, and forge connections that will stay with you for a lifetime. 

The transformative power of travel is real, and Vietnam has a way of leaving an indelible mark on your heart and soul. So pack your bags, open your mind, and prepare for an adventure that will expand your horizons and leave you with cherished memories and a newfound appreciation for the beauty of human connection.

If you’re interested in traveling with us to South Africa in 2024 or on an upcoming trip to Vietnam in 2025, sign-up here to get information as it becomes available. 

Top 7 Tips for Successful Multigenerational Travel

I recently returned from a daughter, mother, grandmother trip to visit my son at Michigan State University (MSU). For almost 20 years, the three of us have intentionally planned trips to learn, connect, and seek adventure together. 

The trips have ranged from visiting the American Girl store in Chicago, a long weekend in Door County, week-long getaways in Michigan to two weeks in Italy and France during my daughter’s time studying abroad.  

We’ve had great times and created wonderful memories, but we've also learned how to travel well together. It’s not always easy when there is a 57 year age difference. 

Over time, and through trial-and-error, we’ve discovered seven strategies that work for us for successful multigenerational travel. 

1. Choose a Destination with a Personal Connection

My mom (grandma) grew up in Michigan. I was born in Michigan, lived there until I was two years old, and spent summers in my youth traveling back to Michigan to visit my grandparents. It’s been fun to intentionally plan trips back to Michigan to stir up memories and reminisce. Our trip to MSU was to visit my son at college, but also for my mom to share her stories of being a student there too. 

As you plan your trip, think about the purpose of traveling together. Is there a destination that would be fun for everyone, but also have a special connection for one or more of your family members? Do you want to create memories for your children? Do you want your children to get to know your parents and their life stories better? Craft an itinerary that fulfills the purpose for everyone.

2. Plan Activities You All Can Enjoy 

Given our age differences, choosing activities that we all enjoy can be challenging. Adventure sports, long strenuous hikes, or even hours spent in a museum don’t bring the same joy for all of us. However, there are two things we can all agree on—our love for local culture and food. We seek out innovative restaurants, local markets, or unique local boutiques while also stopping by meaningful locations during our trips. 

During our recent weekend away, we drove by the house my parents built (my first home) and the hospital where I was born. My mom enjoyed seeing the changes in these places over time, and my daughter and I enjoyed hearing her relive her memories from her time in Lansing. 

Planning activities with a mixture of new and old experiences creates excellent conversation and rich new memories together.

Have a conversation before your trip and identify what type of activities each person would enjoy. Consider each traveler's passions. Can you include that type of activity into your itinerary for everyone to enjoy? 

Do your research. We’ve found unique activities via travel books, blogs, and most recently, Tik Tok and Instagram influencers. Keep your mind open! Some of our most memorable experiences lately have come from ideas discovered by my daughter through social media. 

3. Let the Young Navigate

One of the biggest roadblocks we have tackled is how to get from A to Z. I have frequently felt stuck in the middle of a map reader (my mom) and an online Google Maps expert (my daughter). It came to a head on our trip to Europe four years ago. After living in France for six months, my daughter had Google Maps iPhone navigation down to a science. She could map us on any type of public transportation — trains, buses, and subways —in no time flat. Growing up using paper maps, my mom felt lost without seeing the big picture of where we were going to ensure we were going in the right direction. She would get anxious and frustrated with my daughter and me for not slowing down so she could review the map before deciding which direction we should go. Within a few hours, I realized I had to help my mom let go of control, trust her granddaughter's navigation skills, and be ok with following her lead so we could travel together without angst. 

In our experience, letting the young navigate creates less friction and gets us where we are going more quickly. This is not always easy for the older adults in the group who have been reliant on paper maps for travel. Our advice is to discuss this before your trip, review a paper map before your day begins, and encourage older travelers to trust, relax, and let go of the need to navigate during the day. 

4. Pack Light

A travel mantra I heard over and over growing up was never to pack more than you can carry. This has been critically important to remember during our multigenerational trips. We pack light and do not worry about wearing the same outfit multiple times. It keeps us mobile and allows us to quickly help one another when needed. 

We recommend traveling with a lightweight roller bag with 360-degree wheels and a backpack that can easily fit under the airplane seat and be light enough to carry while exploring new areas. Traveling light helps everyone in your group feel in control of their belongings, move more efficiently, and stay together during your trip. 

5. Listen

While walking the MSU campus, my mom started reminiscing about her time there from 1958 to 1962. Hearing her stories about being required to wear heels and suits to the football games, wear skirts to classes (women were not allowed to wear pants), and be in her room by curfew made Ella and I realize how far women have come in two generations. It made us appreciate the challenges women have fought to overcome so that our lives are better. 

Listening to stories from the generations ahead of you can help you better appreciate your life and opportunities while gaining new respect and appreciation for their past. This experience can create new connections between all travelers. 

Ask questions and listen. There is nothing like learning about someone in the place they lived or through an experience they had as a child as they relive it as an adult with you. It’s also fun for the adults to see a place through the eyes of younger generations for a fresh take on a familiar place.

6. Slow down

Let’s face it, our travel speed changes as we age. As my daughter, mother, and I have traveled together, we have had to adjust our expectations, pace, and patience as we have gotten older. We don't move at the same speed or schedule as many activities into a day as we once did.

Technology has added travel challenges. Mobile tickets, online check-ins, and QR codes can feel overwhelming when a person in your group is less comfortable with these new processes. Navigating technology-enhanced travel naturally takes more time for anyone not as familiar with digital changes. 

Yet, slowing down has benefits. There is more time to enjoy the scenery, take in the sounds around you, and appreciate the moment you're in instead of anticipating the next activity or sight to see.

It’s unrealistic to expect your multigenerational travel companions to all move at the same speed. Be realistic. Modify your expectations before you travel. Take the time to help others in your group who move more slowly. Walk with them. Help them with their luggage and work with them to navigate new technology. You’ll build new bonds and nurture a new relationship.

7. Be Grateful

My daughter, mother, and I are grateful for our time together traveling and the memories we’ve created. We understand that we’re lucky to have these opportunities. We have years of travel memories together. This past weekend, we added to those as we ate gelato for breakfast, wandered local boutiques, introduced my mom to Lululemon leggings and kombucha, shared memories over coffee and wine, and walked miles and miles around campus.  

Whether you are planning multigenerational trips with family or friends, consider these seven strategies for success.

What did we miss? What has worked for you and your family? Let us know. 

Are you wondering what to pack when you travel? Check out our favorite tips and items in our Jetsetter's Guide: Master the Art of Savvy Packing.